Wednesday, April 23, 2008

School


So, here's the deal-

We really haven't had many updates here in... well, awhile. I got to have some fun with my "You Know What Ending Sucked?" rant, but overall, nothing has really been posted here in awhile. Most of this has to do with school really picked up in the past few weeks. In case you do not know, this blog is being run by three college students (one senior and two sophomores) with various majors in the fields of English, Biology, and Business. We only have two weeks left before we get out (and till Jason graduates) and, in that time, we have a crap load of stuff to do. For me, it's two finals and four big papers. So, until we get out of here, there is not going to be really anything posted. However, once summer starts, we are going to try to re-vamp this place and get the posts to be more regular. Until then, here are some of the movie related things I have been thinking about-

The Incredible Hulk-

It could be awful, but I think it looks like a lot of fun. I really like Edward Norton and I'm really interested in seeing where this ends up going. In case you haven't heard, there is a 26 minute fight scene at the end of the film between the Hulk and Abomination. This could either be amazing or just a terrible idea. We will see.

The Dark Knight-

I am living for this movie. Literally. 

Iron Man-

All the early buzz and reviews has been positive and I'm looking forward to see how it turns out next week in the theater. Next week! I can't wait.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall-

Better than I thought it would be in so many ways. Jason Segel is my hero now (not only is he the star, but he wrote the screenplay). Really, go see this movie. Judd Apatow is still on a roll with these productions. 

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith-

Yeah, this movie is old news, but I recently caught it again on Spike TV in a full screen presentation and let me tell... it looked awful. Never has the power of widescreen been made more obvious than by this presentation. The effects looked bad... the acting looked bad... everything was just bad. I mean, the movie isn't perfect to begin with, but I enjoyed it for the most part in widescreen. I'm gonna have to watch it again in widescreen just to get this terrible taste out of my mouth. Expect a bigger rant on full screen in the future.

Thanks for reading and see you guys in the summer.

Thursday, April 3, 2008

You Know What Ending Sucked?



It’s the mid-1990’s. Scream has come out and struck box office gold. The Kevin Williamson era of slasher movies has begun. Unlike the 1980’s slasher film era that centered around unstoppable killers such as the hockey mask wearing Jason Voorhees and dream-killer Freddy Kruger, the 1990’s slasher era would center around human killers (whose identity usually was a mystery for the whole film) and cast of young teens from popular WB shows and Dawson’s Creek. Unlike the 1980’s era of slasher cinema, the gore was toned down and, in some instances, made more realistic. Most of the emphasis of these films was on the mystery and insanity of the situation- not the kills, which a lot of 1980’s slasher films tended to focus on. Also, the teens in these films tended to be more aware of horror films, pop culture, and their place in society than the usual victims presented in a slasher film.

This movie made Williamson Hollywood's new golden boy for horror. If only they could have seen down the road for his upcoming gems like Cursed.

With Scream hitting it big in 1996, screenwriter Kevin Williamson (whose background surprisingly was in the lame teenybopper show Dawson’s Creek) was Hollywood’s new golden boy for horror. Although his script for I Know What You Did Last Summer was purchased before his screenplay for Scream, it was quickly green lit and rushed into production by producers when Scream became a box office smash.

The film was loosely based on popular teen crime drama writer Lois Duncan’s novel of the same name. And when I say loosely- I mean loosely.

But I’m getting sidetracked- we’ll come back to the butchering of the novel. After all, that’s not what this rant is about- it’s about the ending of this poorly thought-out teenage slasher crap.

Only the guy on the left survives this movie with any dignity left at the end.

Actually, maybe I’m being too harsh. I gotta admit, the majority of this movie is fun to watch. Well, at least it was when I was 12. I haven’t seen the thing in years, so it probably won’t hold up very well. But, for the most part, I remember this being a solid rental at best and an entertaining way to spend an hour and half. The premise was a nice hook (pun….hah) and Ryan Phillippe spends most of the movie being a complete jerk- it’s fun to watch. Plus, the acting skills of Freddie Prince, Jr. are something that will always put joy in my heart. Seriously, this guy cannot act his way out of a paper bag. And I’m not even talking about a sealed paper bag- this thing is wide open. Freddie Prince, Jr. is on the same line of acting that Steven Seagal is on. They’re both only capable of one or two facial expressions and they milk the hell out of them whenever they can. I remember seeing one Seagal movie where it was obviously he had just learned to smile on film and he used his new ability whenever he could. It was great stuff. It was like he was a little kid who had just learned to walk and wanted to show it to everyone who passed him by.

This one facial expression represents thirty-five different emotions for Freddie.

Okay, I’m really getting off topic here. Here’s the main point of my rant. As with most of the Williamson era slasher films, I Know What You Did Last Summer teases the audience and characters throughout the film because the identity of the killer is unknown. So, throughout the film, you start to question every one you see, wondering if they could actually be responsible for what’s going on. Williamson did the same thing in Scream and still made the reveal of the killer shocking by making it the guy you always thought it was (and as bonus, this guy was already “killed” earlier in the film) and another guy you would never expect. The best part- they don’t even have a motive. They’re just killing because it looked like fun and they’ve just watched too many horror movies. I know Scream gets a lot of crap these days such it was a trendsetter and all, but this was a great ending and some solid writing.

Guess who? No, really. Who?

So, with this in mind, you’re expecting some solid writing and a great twist reveal of the killer at the end of I Know What You Did Last Summer. Well guess what…the killer is…Ben Willis! Wait, who the hell is Ben Willis? I don’t know who that is. You know why? It’s because he’s just some guy that isn’t even introduced until the end of the movie! What the hell is this? Is this supposed to be creative or cutting edge? The guy is literarily introduced as a suspect at the end of the film via a newspaper article. How cinematic! Seriously, this is poor storytelling. Did Williamson ever watch an episode of Scooby-Doo (most of this cast would end up in the movie version of Scooby-Doo, something that is horribly ironic)? It’s not that hard- you introduce Old Man Wilkinson at the beginning and then you pull the mask off of him at the end of the film. And what kind of name is Ben Willis? Ben Willis! I’m terrified.

Seriously, there couldn’t be a lamer and more disappointing reveal of a killer in a movie that I can remember. I was lying in my bed last night, trying to fall to sleep when I remembered this ending. Then I couldn’t fall asleep because I was in shock at how ridiculously poorly though out and bad it was.

Okay, to be fair Ben Willis was introduced at the beginning of the movie…kinda. He’s the guy that the teens accidentally run over with their car. See, they spend the whole movie thinking they run over this kid that was found dead in the sea named David Egan. But turns out it was Ben Willis who killed Egan, who was accidentally responsible for his daughter’s death. After killing Egan, Willis started to cross the street when he was hit by the drunken teens, thus starting our film. I guess it looks good on paper but, watching the film, it’s kind of a bummer to have the killer be some guy whose story is not even introduced till the very last minute. I mean, would it have been that hard for the guy to be in their lives in some way, making his reveal much more dramatic. Isn’t that how these things work? Isn’t that one of the primarily rules or something? Way to drop the ball Williamson.

It’s even easier to see this as a misstep when looking at Lois Duncan’s original novel. In the novel, the teens run over a young boy, making the act even worse. And the killer isn’t some stock character fisherman that uses a hook named Ben Willis- it’s the young boy’s brother. And guess what? Yes, that’s right, he actually interacts with the characters, forming a friendship with Helen (Sarah Michele Gellar’s character in the film) at the pool of her apartment complex. Of course, we don’t know he’s the kid’s brother until the end. But that’s how this genre works. It’s a shocking reveal. You think the guy’s your friend and then he kills you. It’s simple but effective.

And you know what works even better in the novel- the kills or lack thereof. Well, nobody is really killed in the novel. Instead, much worse things occur. Instead of Barry getting hooked to death like in the film, he is shot in the abdomen. The shot is not fatal but it is bad enough to wear he has to be fitted for a colostomy bag, ending his much anticipated sports career before it even starts. Helen isn’t killed with a hook like the film either. Instead, she is thrown from the bathroom window of her condominium. She survives the fall but is crippled for the rest of her life. That’s some brutal stuff right there. These kids ruined his life so he’s ruining their lives. It’s pretty awesome stuff. Too bad Williamson turned it another generic slasher flick.

Poor Lois Duncan. The killer doesn't even use a hook in her book.

Here’s something else that pisses me off that I just found out today. Apparently author Lois Duncan was barred from the set and was not allowed to read Williamson’s script. What the hell is that about?  She was not aware of the drastic changes until she saw the movie when it was released in theaters. Reportedly, she was not pleased with the changes. In fact, she was disgusted.

While we’re tearing this thing up, here’s something else that doesn’t make any sense. How come the minor characters such as Helen’s sister and Max get brutal on-screen deaths while the major characters such as Barry and Helen all die off-screen? Seriously, what the hell is that about? Why do these characters we know nothing about get it in the most brutal way possible? Max gets a hook through the bottom of the chin and then is slammed on a table. Then Barry finally gets hooked and all we see is a hook going up and down and Barry’s facial expressions. What’s that about? It’s fine to not show gore (in many ways, it can be more effective) but, if you’re going to go all out on the minor characters, it’s a slap in the face to hold back on the people we’re actually supposed to care about. And what was going on with Helen’s death scene? I couldn’t tell what was going on with all that rapid cutting and short shot length. Really, who shots a death scene like that? Sarah Michele Gellar finally gets it and we get a bunch of quick cuts? Really? Come on dude, you gotta milk that scene for what it’s worth, not completely side step it like that. It was ridiculous. I almost started to wonder if Sarah Michele Gellar had a clause in her contract that said that she couldn’t be showed getting killed on-screen or something. It was just silly.

You can't kill Buffy on-screen. She's too good for that...well, until Scream 2. 

And then there was that last scene in the showers of Julie’s college. Oh man…just thinking about this horrible ending made me vomit in my mouth a little bit… The showers are all fogged up and one has “I Still Know” written on it. Then there’s silence. Julie can’t move. Then good ole’ Ben Willis (who was supposed “killed” in the climax of the film) shoots through the glass and Julie lets out a horrible scream. Cut to black. Really? Man, how old is this kind of ending. It worked for Carrie and Friday the 13th, but the cheapness of the execution in this film is just insulting. It just makes me angry to think about it. You know what, screw this movie. Forget about what I said about it being a good way to waste an hour and a half. It may not be as bad as its unspeakably bad sequel, but it still sucks. Ben Willis…man, what a terrible ending.

I felt the same way about this ending, Jennifer. The same way...

Go re-watch Scream instead. It still holds up pretty good.

If only Seagal had been the killer. Can you imagine a stare-off between him and Freddie Prince? It would end the world.